Someone could be wondering, Why should I engage in premarital counselling, Afterall I already know all there is about s3x, and so does my partner, you add.
Yes, you might know the A-Z of s3xual activities (which is highly doubtful by the way), but do you know the A-Z of s3x with that partner you are intending to marry?
In the Nigerian society it is not uncommon to hear people say they want to remain virgins till they’re married, or, in other instances, others taste the fruit of life, but decide to stay away from it till they take their wedding vows.
How, then, do couples escape s3xual frustration in these instances if they don’t at least talk about it?
What results from these instances, is a total lack of s3xual familiarity by the time couples get married.
This is not entirely a bad thing, as couples are surely permitted to grow together in every sense of the word – financially, age-wise, spiritually, etc.
However, what if one of the partners has an idea of s3x, an expectation that the other sees as absurd and would totally never agree to bend to?
What if the libido of one of them is far, far higher than the other’s, and they can’t even keep up with the s3xual demand being placed on them? (which, as a matter of fact, you have to meet as a matter of necessity.)
The importance of pre-marital s3x counselling here becomes a lot more glaring, right?
Here are the top 3 reasons why you ABSOLUTELY have to have pre-marital s3x counselling sessions before you jump into marriage with anyone.
You have an idea of what to expect
Many people, especially those who never engaged in premarital s3x, might find some shockers once they marry.
What if the husband’s thing looks too scary to take, and what if he has a thing for anal s3x, when the can not even imagine the act for the life of her?
What happens when one of the couple likes to use s3x toys, watch p*rn and get some oral s3x, when the other completely detests three?
Can you imagine not knowing and actually settling all these things before going on to marry someone?
The potential chaos!
Once you and your partner get a number of sessions where you discuss your s3xual preferences and things you would rather not do, you create a foundation upon which to build a fiery s3xual connection even before the marriage document is signed.
You might not have actually done the s3xual acts, but at least you could reach a sensible compromise, know what to expect, and prepare for it.
Afterall, s3x is very mental as much as physical.
Reduces third party intervention
When problems emanate in the bedroom, it’s presence is felt in every other room in the house.
When you refuse to get counselling sessions, or actually discuss these s3xual issues thoroughly before marriage, you give room for problems that might dog your marriage and require the presence of your pastor, parents, friends, etc.
Why not do it before marriage since you might be forced to embarrassingly do it later?
Slashes the chances of early divorce
When you try to settle your s3xual preferences after you’re already married, and you discover that your partner’s needs are things you can never get yourself to accept, the next thing will be to divorce due to ‘irreconciliable differences.’
Now imagine if you had that same conversation pre-marriage. Walking out will not count as a divorce, will it?
In conclusion, it needs to be mentioned here that in the instance where partners can extensively have private discussions on these matters and reach satisfactory compromises, there might be a need to do away with a counselor.
The bottom line is for there to be full disclosure and understanding between the both of them.
Okegbemi Olusoji Festus is an Editor/Creative writer at campustori.com, A digital media Executive and a known Social Media Enthusiast.